It's been a while since I've written, and with good reason. Our beautiful little miracle, Piper Louise, arrived at 5:41pm on March 19, 2012. She weighed a whopping 8lbs 10oz and was 20.5inches long. What a big, healthy girl she is!
I was doing well, for me, up until the night before my induction was scheduled. I was feeling soooo anxious that entire day, not to mention fairly regular contractions to contend with. I felt fear grip me that night. I was scared something would happen to our baby while I slept. I dreaded hearing the same words we heard just 19 months prior. I cried, a lot, the night before delivery. I felt horribly anxious and didn't sleep much at all. I loved feeling every last kick, and movement throughout the night. It gave me reassurance that our baby girl was doing well. She sure liked to keep me on my toes during the pregnancy and the end wasn't any different. Just four days before my induction she decided to do a forward flip (according to my OB) and turned herself breech. I felt panicked about the possibility of a c-section. That entire weekend, I had really big movements, like she was trying to turn, but felt like she was still breech. When I went in for monitoring that Saturday, my OB was on call and did an ultrasound to see what position she was in. She was still breech. She said we would try to turn her Monday morning, if she hadn't turned back herself by then. If it was unsuccessful,, I would be sectioned. I tried to mentally prepare. I'd never had surgery before, except for dental, and that's just not the same.
Sunday night I had a terrible emptiness feeling in my arms. I was missing our Everett something fierce. I was reliving everything we had been through with him. I was a complete mess. All I could do was get in the shower and cry long and hard. Monday morning finally came and I was still an anxious mess, driving my husband crazy by asking him a million times if he thought our baby would be OK. We got to the hospital and got registered and my heart was beating a million miles a minute. I walked into my room and there was S., the super awesome grief and loss nurse who helped get me through this pregnancy, ready to get me all set up. I couldn't help but cry again. I didn't feel any less anxious until she hooked up the heart rate monitor to my belly and I got to hear that beautiful heart, beating like crazy. I got through this first step of the induction process. I told myself, it's going to be so different this time.
S. got my IV hooked up quickly and only had to poke me once. Again, much different than last time around. Much more pleasant than being stuck and veins blown out multiple times! My OB came into my room. She was dressed in her scrubs and was wearing her pearls. I was told she wore pearls in the OR, she's a classy lady like that. That made me nervous that maybe I would be taken into the OR for delivery. She got the ultrasound out to check Piper's location and low and behold, she turned back to head down! I couldn't believe it. However she was not engaged in the birth canal. Pitocin was started to get her moving in a downward direction and engaged to come out! My OB checked me and I was 4cm dilated already and over 50% effaced. It was Piper time! Pitocin was started and the labor process had begun.
I stayed on the pitocin for many hours, with my OB occasionally checking me to see what progress I had made. It was slow progress. I was handling the contractions well, and so was Piper. I told myself that maybe I could do this without an epidural, which is what I preferred this time around. After about 6 hours S. was getting ready to turn the pitocin up to a much higher level where contractions would be getting more intense and it would be more difficult to get the epidural placed due to pain. I decided to go ahead an have one placed, just in case. My epidural experience with Lilli and Everett was less than ideal. This made me very anxious. The anesthesiologist came in and was very nice. He spent about a half an hour trying to get it placed just right. The entire time S. kept us laughing and the mood light in the room. Next thing I knew, it was placed. No issues, no spinal fluid leaked out like last time. What a relief!
About an hour later, my OB came in and broke my water to try and get Piper to move down further in the birth canal. It felt like a tidal wave, there was so much fluid! S. had Dave, my sister and I make guesses what time she would arrive and how much she would weigh. It was kind of like a game. I made my guess based off of what she was measuring the week before which was 6lbs 4oz.
After about 9 hours of being on the pitocin, my OB came in to check me, it was after 5pm at this point. I felt like I would be in labor forever! She was very calm the entire time, feeling to see where I had progressed (only 6cm). She then calmly told me where I was with dilation and then calmly told me that she felt some cord, and felt it wrapped around something as well. The cord had prolapsed out. I started to feel panicked. S. let me know that at no point was the baby in any distress, but they would have to stop the pitocin. Next thing I knew, my OB was telling me they were taking me back to the OR for a c-section. I had a look of panic come over my face and I saw my sister look at me and tell me it would be OK. I think I told her I didn't think so. In a matter of seconds my room filled with all kinds of people prepping me for a c-section. I wanted to cry. I was scared. Dave was taken out of my room to be prepped as well. In a matter of minutes I was being wheeled down the hall to the O.R. I couldn't believe this was happening. My nurse was so excited because this meant we were about to meet Piper now!
There were so many people in the O.R. I remember a big sheet being pulled up to block my view, kind of like a tent. Dave was next to my head and S. was smiling like crazy. They did a test on me to make sure I couldn't feel anything and next thing I knew, I was being cut open. What a strange feeling that was! It wasn't very long and I could hear my OB remarking about our baby girl we'd waited so long to meet. Next thing I knew I heard our Piper's screams. What an amazing and beautiful sound that was! She screamed like crazy and I was so unbelievably happy! I started crying. They briefly brought her by my head so I could see her. She is so beautiful. They got her cleaned up and she continued to scream and they brought her to me again to give her a kiss before she was brought up to the NICU for observation. We opted to have her delivered early to try to prevent another loss from happening. I found out her cord was not only prolapsed, but wrapped around her neck. I was told it was not tight, but she would have experienced distress had they not sectioned me. I sent my husband off to be with our girl while they finished closing me up.
Our amazing girl only spent 4 hours in the NICU for observation and to have her blood sugars monitored. She was brought down to my room after that and I really got to have my first good look at our new beauty.
Our baby girl will be three weeks old on Monday. We are exhausted, but so relieved and happy that she is here and in our lives. Lilli is such a proud big sister and has been very helpful with her baby sister. She has commented to me several times that she is so happy her sister is out of my belly and at home with us. We are too Lilli!
Love you Piper Louise, Lillian Violet and Everett Eric!